Who Is Mom Crosewl?

Have you been wondering who is this “Mom?”  You know who your Mom is (probably), but do you know who “Mom” is?  After years of painstaking research, we have at last uncovered the true and only history of Mom Crosewl.  There are no rings or Klingons involved, but we hope you will enjoy it.

Born Gwynyth Elwlelsyuin in a small Welsh town, Mom Crosewl was the eldest child of tenant farmers whose greatest wish was to have a son.  After ten unsuccessful attempts, Enoch Elwlelsyuin was born, and his mother, overcome with joy and relief, did the natural thing now that she had served her purpose and promptly died.  To make matters worse, the Prince who owned the Elwlelsyuin family farm evicted them for no particular reason, and so Mr. Elwlelsyuin was suddenly faced with a bleak prospect.  Being a resourceful man, he decided to part with as many of his children as possible in order to raise enough funds to purchase another farm.

Gwynyth, at twelve, was the most clever of the brood, and was apprenticed to a local cheese maker.  However, Fate had a way of intervening for our heroine; cheese making was only a cover for Master Selbit Crosewl of Tenby-on-Neale.  He was in fact a conjurer, prestidigitator, and all around magical sort of person.  Master Crosewl and his wife, Talma, saw in the young Gwynyth a chance to pass down all their years of knowledge and expertise in what had been, before the Renaissance, considered “Black Arts” and “Devil’s Play.”  The Crosewl’s only child, Thor, had gone off in the crusades years ago never to be seen again.  They were, therefore, anxious to find a suitable candidate to preserve their legacy, and Gwynyth turned out to be the answer to their prayers.

The Crosewl’s started her out slowly, since she also had to learn to make sharp cheddar between illusions.  Gwynyth proved to be an astute student and was soon as clever at producing cards as she was at curds.  She was growing quite fond of the Crosewls, as were they of her, when Fate once again reared its head.  This time it was in the form of Thor, the long-lost son whose death had been sorely overrated.  The Crosewls were understandably shocked and overjoyed by the return of their son.  Thor, on the other hand, was less than pleased to find that his rightful place as heir to the Crosewl legacy was being usurped by an outsider, and a girl at that!

To keep peace in their family, the Crosewls reached the painful decision that Gwynyth’s tutelage as a Magician must come to an end.  They did not wish to part with her entirely and her cheese lessons continued.  Thor, in the meantime, was shown the ways of the Crosewl heritage, and was making excellent progress.  He still lacked that extra flair that Gwynyth had shown so effortlessly, but his parents were satisfied and secretly hoped eventually there would be a union of their son and adopted daughter.

Thor was a rather tall man whose ego was even taller, and he thought Gwynyth not quite worthy of his attentions.  Once again Fate, that leveler of all heights, stepped in to set the course of events right.  The Prince, who had evicted Gwynyth’s family, was now suffering in the dotage of his old age from the family malady that had been passed on by generations of inbreeding.  He was a nut case.  He had somehow decided that the entire village of Tenby was to be destroyed unless some person from the town could demonstrate an exceptional reason to spare them all.

The Prince proposed a day of contest in which every household must exhibit their best skill and, the one judged the most worthy, would save Tenby and be given a high honor.  Of course, if no one pleased the Prince, the entire village would suffer the consequences.  Everyone in Tenby was thrown in to a whirl of activity as they only had a fortnight to the dreadful date.

The Crosewls were uncertain as to whether Thor would be ready in time for the contest.  They tried to coax their son to accept Gwynyth’s assistance, but to no avail.  For her part, Gwynyth was going to present her finest cheeses to the Prince, but she also had another plan.  She had never stopped practicing the magic skills which the Crosewls had taught her, and she knew that her abilities far outshone the arrogant Thor’s.  She resolved to be ready to bail him out should his demonstration proved to be a disaster.

The contest day arrived and every villager lined up to display their various talents.  Thor and Gwynyth were next to the last to exhibit, so they could judge the Prince’s temperament.  Tenby was full of spinners, weavers, farmers, coopers, smithies of all types, herders, and a variety of craftspeople all of whom tried to demonstrate the best wares and talents of their vocations.  Some even showed a flair for juggling, singing, dancing, speaking a pretty poem, belching on cue, fire eating, or playing an instrument, yet no one could make the addle-pated Prince even smirk.  Things looked grim for Tenby when Thor stepped up to begin.

He was all confidence and ease as he opened with a silk scarf production followed by his linking rings.  The Prince stopped yawning and looked intrigued.  Then Thor started to make cards appear when something went wrong halfway through the routine, which he tried to salvage but could not.  Flustered and sensing the Prince’s disappointment, Thor brought out his show saver, cups and balls.  He was doing well, but realized that he had not brought the pumpkin for the conclusion, and racked his brains for an alternative.  Gwynyth was by his side in an instant and, with a move that defied the laws of nature, assisted him to produce beneath the middle cup the largest wheel of cheese the village had ever beheld.  The hall was stunned for a moment into silence which was quickly broken by the Prince leaping to his feet, applauding wildly, and declaring Thor and Gwynyth the winners.  Tenby was saved by the mighty cheese, and the Crosewls were heroes!

True to his word, the Prince granted Thor a large parcel of land and made him Lord Baron of this manor and its tenants.  Gwynyth was given the title of Dame and she and Thor’s parents joined him on his new estate.  Thor did feel indebted to Gwynyth for saving his face, and he married her.  In time, they became quite fond of each other, and became the proud parents of a dozen children.

Gwynyth, now known everywhere as Dame or Mom Crosewl, outlived Thor many years.  She performed many shows both with Thor and by herself traveling extensively through the British Isles.  It was on one such trip that she fell in love with the charming hamlet of Revel Grove and is happily retired here to this day.  Who knows, you may even run into Mom Crosewl as you stroll the lanes of Revel Grove.

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